Translation guide for understanding UC press releases

(reposted from elsewhere)

“We wish to remind everyone of the limits of protest”: being on campus at any given time may be an offense punishable by police brutality.

“Members of the university community”: People punishable without due process by university courts.

“Members of the community”:  People against whom we have no recourse after the DA acknowledges that we have no case.

“Anarchist”: 1a) a word I heard on television the other day; 2a) a resident of San Francisco

“Nonstudent”: all purpose term for student from another campus, faculty, community supporters, press

“Bystander”: faculty member pushed off a ledge by police

“Outside agitator”: grad student visiting from new york

“Protestor”: the 34,500 students not involved in the protest.

“Criminal”: everyone involved in the protest.

“Terrorist”: everyone in the state of California against whom we have not yet had to admit that we have no evidence.

“All night hip-hop concert”: imminent do-rag threat.

“Genuinely feared for our lives”: roused from our coffins before completing nocturnal regeneration.

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